Gone

she had left on 12.12.2007.

Many thanks to people who visit my blog lately and shown concern.

I am Better

It's raining now. Felt so cold due to the drizzling since evening. My mind somehow had stabilized abit but still it's hard to swallow that kind of sadness. Counting the days, the matter has been dragging for 2 over months and I can't believe I can still continue to this stage. Everyday is driving me crazy. U seem to be cold and much more unconcern towards me as compared to the past and I know I can't ask for much as of today. I jz felt pathetic and the only thing I can do is to keep on trying. I will make some effort and I really hope you can see it and treat me slight better den previously.

I constantly remind myself not to ask too much about u. I don wan 2 interfere much of ur life altot I am extremely concern on ur well being. You told me you drove a car with ur friends beside u. I am thinking alot of possibilities when u mentioned that. But I chose not to ask too detail because I know I am not in a position to be so KPO about ur life. Who M i to you now? No one can give an answer to that. But I still hoped to get updated information about u, that's including on ur life lately, at least the basic. You may call me when u r free as what I had done so far. Pursue ur dream in 2 mths time. I only want to spent the last few moments with u when u r still around. That's what I asked for and nothing else. =)

My Ordinary Life's

Day’s has been very ordinarily gone past me. That’s what I want in life but I need companionship. But sadly to say, it was still uncertain and things still kept in suspend. I truly know what I want but I can’t fulfill it. I can’t hold you, I can’t feel you. How painful to see you suffering yet I am helpless. I can only watch you from far and hope you recover soonest.

Belief and persistent is the key words to a success relationship. That’s my belief and always sticks on to me. I am lonely too but I am trying to adapt life without you because I am facing the realistic life. I don’t want to lose you but I got no say when it comes to this stage. I wan a crystal clear love without no impurities, that’s what everyone is looking for. You owed me an answer that for sure. But rest assures that there will be no expiry date this time round. No one can promise anything and when you finally made the decision, the reply might not what you think. Time changes anything, fades every relationship if everyone forgot to keep it in the heart. I still kept mine inside deeply and sealed. How about yours?

One life saved

Something interesting happen during work. One female complainant came to post and infd that for the past few days, she heard kitten 'meowing' around the vicinity at 559A CCK Nth 6 MSCP. It was only today she locate the exact location of the kitten. The kitten was actually trapped inside a water drain which was located between a car park lot. The water drain was uncovered and I suppose the kitten accidentally slipped into the drain.

Poor little kitten, all I can hear upon my arrival is its calling. A call under the drain. I cant c it cos the drain is piped down and with bend. The kitten is yelling for help and the mummy cat was around monitoring yet helpless. I felt something must be done, I will try my best to rescue the poor thing. My partner and I tried to reach out to the kitten and stretch out arm into the depth but to no avail. But before we do that, there was a car obstructing the drain. I had to contact the car owner to drove the vehicle away before my mission begins.

Still I cant c the kitten. I contacted the town council personnel who came down about 15mins later. He briefly explained to me on the model of the drain and seem helpless. He activated the plumper! This time rd the 2 plumper's came down with a lorry. They removed the drain cover on d other side and tried to find mean to lure the kitten out, again effort gone down to 'drain'. They even tried using thong to clip the kitten out, ouch! that will be painful, but mission failed. They thought of using water to flush down the kitten to the other side of the drain, which might be fatal if there's blockage somewhere along the pipe. Some passerby started to gather with cat lover felt sorry for the kitten state. Poor little thing, all seem hopeless and we even thought of activating the SCDF rescue team if nothing works.

Jz when all the method was used up, one of the plumper used a long clothes and managed to pull up the kitten! the craw of the kitten managed to entangled onto the fabric clothes. Up it goes like a escalator! I saw the kitten which was dirty, very dirty. it was sooooooo cute! At this juncture, everyone was clapping their hands and finally it was a relief. We placed the kitten on the grass patch and it keep following us as if we were the mummy. Cute little angel. How I wish to adopt but cant. The mother cat was around. we managed to return the custody to the mother which was nearby. It was indeed a job satisfaction as my job is about saving life and property.

Today, I saved one kitten life and great sense of job satisfaction. Cya little kitten in Choa Chu Kang estate. Dont ever lost ur way and fall into trap. Good nite little kitten on the ground surface. Hope U can rest well for today. Mummy beside u k. =)

Why?

I tried my best to communicate but failed. I swear to god that I am a better man as compared to the past. Whats more you wan from me? Y cant u accept everything and continue with the journey? Y need to dwell on the past and insist ur way?

May b I am not good enuff for u, May b u r the victim of this r.s. But what u really wan from me? everything that I had done, u will nv satisfied. You treat mi like an enemy, critized everything that I do, u felt disgusted. U r selfish, if u wana let go, pls do so after much thought. Pls dun b so selfish and hold on to it jz bcos u fear of regretting and coping YOUR life without me. U voice out to ur friends and colleague on hw bad m i, they told u to end it. Y nt folo their wish? Y have ur own judgement, u knw hw i treat u for the past few mths. M i really that bad? pls let mi knw if u wan 2 end once and for all, cos there's no pt arguing on who's rite who's wrong. U shut the door and felt everyone is against you and u totally changed! No matter hw much we discuss, nothing conclusive will surface. I m sick, really sick of all these. Pls dun regret in what decision u had made, cos I respect ur decision. Pls. Give mi a reply soonest. I am suffocating and had enuff!

It's my Birthday's

02/11/1983-02/11/2007

it's my 24th Birthday's today. Gosh ! Im that old u c. But I still look as young as 20 yrs old. Haha. Dun envy or jealous of me cos I am born to be boylish. =)

Going out soon, wish me sheng ri kuai le! Hope 2dae I will be happy. Huat ar!

19th Month

This mth was the longest ever mth I'd spent with u. Let's not look beyond the future, cause we r uncertain about tomorrow.

What I can say is just a Happy 19th Month my bbdd.......

Class 2B Licence

I'd decided. Will be enrolling class 2B next mth. It's time to achieve a goal which I lack off for the past years. I might be quite late to enroll bikes lesson at the age of 24. I am going at a slow-and-steady mode. Enuff of ppl suan-ing mi of not taking any action, Im gonna do it! It's nt a sudden decision, this has been running thru my mind for years.

Jz came back from JE enter. Went K-box with my frds earlier on. It was slight drizzling and riding at my frds bike makes mi feel a peace of mind. THAT particulars sense of freedom is amazing. THAT moment of enjoyment is over whemling.

Nothing gonna stop me now. No more constrait. This time rd I am serious abt it. Life's about pursuing ur goal, be it a little achievement. Sometimes its the tiny achievement that keep ur life going strongly. Isn't it?

I'm Sorry

I din mean to make u angry. Some part of my purposely going against ur way. Trust me, I dun feel good when u r pissed off. I will try to listen to u, but give mi time k? I had bathe and ate 2 pieces of bread. I will roll to the bed as promised after this entry.

I will try to slp. I can slp. pls tolerate me during this critical period. I'm sorry.

愿望

生日要到了。
今年没太大的愿望。
长大后，生日的意义也越来越平淡， 今年更是糟透了，希望能平平凡凡的度过这一天。

Emotional intelligence

Lately, insomnia has been haunting mi again. Jz came back from in-service, had an interesting speaker 2dae which talk about EQ - Emotional intelligence. I quite agree with wat the speaker had mentioned. that's the chain cause event of Thoughts-Feelings-Action.

This is an example:

instead of,
She's nagging at me (Thoughts)

I felt irritated towards her (Feelings)

I choose 2 ignore when she nag (Action)

Eventually the outcome will be a negative force. He says y nt handled ur emotional and turn it into a positive results. Etc,

She nagging at me (Thoughts)
Ans: cos she cares and loves me.

I felt irritated towards her (Feelings)
Ans: I felt loved and impt.

I choose 2 ignore when she nags(Action)
Ans: I will kiss her (to stop her from nagging)

U c, its hw u tink to make the situation well. By forming a negative effect out of it wun help the case. Diff ppl deal with emos differ-ly. Take it for sadness, if it was well maintained in u, it will lessen the effect to disappointment, where as it caused grieves if otherwise.

So as for 2dae, I learnt hw 2 handle emos and the logic behind it, cos 2 b a successful person u need both the IQ n EQ !

Rain

Raining season had arrived. Constantly the pouring rain, deep inside of me the window shut. =)

Monthly In-service for tml, so i guess im nt slping for 2dae. Lala...gonna watch my fav football match 2nite. Hopefully no one else disturb. =P

I Gave Up

Both my hands raised up in the air.

I gave up.

I'm tired

I'm tired but i cant slp. My brain cant stop thinking. After so much I'd given 2 u. This is what I got in return and I am devastated. Doesn't wish to publicise and think too much. I'm tired and I got to work later. Tink it will be a long hrs ahead of me 2dae.

U need time 2 consider, I respect that. Do u knw that its that considering part that hurts. Dont ask mi why. Dont ask mi for reasons. Dont, cos I dun have the answer for u not even myself.

Look forward Tarts

Dunno whats wrong with me lately. lost my motivation in life. Seem like I am dragging my feet to work everyday. I am not fasting but no appetitte to eat. What wrong Tarts? Everyone's progressing and how abt u ? Still static at point A. have 2 admire your style of living, someone who was bored and dull.

M i really losing myself ? I lost my mind and soul and now im numb. Soon I will be paralsyed.

Goosh..get me a wheel chair pls.

Everyone's shld look forward in life. As for me, I hope certain things remain unchanged and hope time wun fly that fast come this July. Time might be running out but I promise to try my very best from now. But U can c the effort that I'd made so far.

Someone's that was deed to break promises. But this I promise u.

Missed you badly.

Never felt that far apart as before. Finally You will be back by tml. Really missed u badly and how abt u? Reflected of our past while u were away. Can things be resolved or u had already choosen to leave Aust the soonest leaving mi behind. I knw u were determined to study and I wish u all the best.

R u tired and starting to pack ur feelings. or may be I am thinking too much. This week was the worst of the year and I felt so depressed over it. Let's c how it goes as no one can promise anything as for now.

I am puzzled and confused. Give me a sign and lead me to you.

New Lockersets

After almost 7 yrs of waiting. I finally fixed up a new locker sets for my bed room. Branded as 'Fighter Lock' which I do not know what it was trying to imply. I guess it was fighting again fire and wear and tear. Guaranteed for 20 yrs Warranty in which I think that It might not last that long, I suspect that something which make of solid brass should last.

Rationale of getting a new lock sets
Actually there was history behind it. Yr 2000 June-Sept Period, my idiotic brother shifted in to our then new flat @ Panjang, he chosen the bedroom facing the open air as his designated room. He shifted in few mths before our family official shifting. Stay put for while, Not until a dispute broke off between the ownership of the room. Im also balloting the room.

Lucky Queen
One faithful night over at our old Jurong East flat, witnessed by our parents. A ballot was hold in the kitchen area on the ultimate ownership of the open air bedroom. Yes, Luck is on my side. I picked a Queen poker card. My elder bro, unluckily picked a 7. That was then the results was finalised. I got the room in a gentleman style, with a touch of fair lady.

Exposure of common keys
The first brush of battle arise from here. Bro got the duplicate keys for Open air room and since then he was holding on to the keys even thought I was shifted in later on. Ever since then, he gained access into my room without my knowledge and permission for personal matters. I was so flair up because he was so rude and there was no sense of privacy for me.

Long Term Dispute
Ever since day 1, dispute erupted occasionally. He gained access, I was pissed off. Matter was not resolved and I ever rank the idea of changing the locker sets. Nothing was done until 23/07/07.

'Swift action' lead to prolonged issue solved
On 23/07/2007, a normal walk @ bt panjang plaza, happened to walk past DIY Home Fix Store, brought a $16+++ Locker Set. Expectation was high on myself. I brought the set with no idea of fixing it. That was then I got home and configure the fixing. It took me a moments before I master the skill. On the following day, I finally removed the old locker set and replaced it with the brand new 1. New Keys will be kept highly confidential to prevent any unauthorised personnel from taking it off and repeat history.

CONCLUSION
It was all fixed and I am ready to fight against people who trespassing to my room. A disturbance in which I couldn't tolerate. Let's put a stop in all these. Now I finally can sit back and relax in my room. Without much interfere from outsiders who was standing outside my room that was standing by to create havoc. Amen.

Let's c if my plan works. =P

Ps: Small paragraph for my gf. Well, things get slightly better and u better behave urself. U should be in bed by now. Hopefully my blog entertain 5-10 minutes of your boring office life. I will be sending a txt sms 2 u aft this. Stay Tune!

Miscommunication

To: YOU


Dont know what had happened between me n u recently. Keep grumbling abt mi,u dun seem 2 appreciate on what i'd done 4 u. Rem that i'm a simple person who live in a simple lifestyle? Dont make my life complicated and I hoped u understand on point of view in life.

Communication has been disconnected for quite some time. But rest assured that no matter what, I will not give up on u. Always hope that tml will be a better day. We tend to talk back on each other opinion and aspect in life. Why? We must admit that love life isnt the same as the past. But r u willing to listen to me? Well, as a guy, I will have my say and persistence in my view and order. Bot bcos im Ego in nature. I need some mutual respect, at least the minimal. Trust me, Dont give up on me. TOLERATE is the golden word. Always tolerate my nonsense as I believed that Love is about accepting my everything and even my unacceptable nonsense.

Will u be with me on my side or going against me? I'm confused on ur belief. Give me a sign, an indication as to assure this poor little unsecured chap.

From: ME

Ahhhh......Chew!!

Just recovered from sickness few days back. Never felt so sick for the past 1 yr. In fact, it was my first MC that i took for the past 1 yr. Running nose, nose block, coughing and sore throat and with an additional bonus : Fever. All those comes in a package and invade into my life in a span of 3 days. Its quite hard 4 me 2 collapse and if I do, I will be extremely sick.

I'm sweating while posting this blog. The weather in the global was unbearable, esp in yr 2007. I read an article stating that 07 will be the hottest yr for the century. Uprising temperature due to green house effect. There's a big hole in our ozone layer n if human still continued in behaving UN-environmental-free, WE WILL BE DESTROYED! No joke ok. But it wun affect us but our next few generation. So u need not worried.

Think im going 2 bath 1st. So freaking hot!!!! Buay tahan ar!

UOB Platinum Card

For the past few days, I haf been opening up the letterbox in hoping to received a letter. This morning after my shift work, I opened up the letterbox and finally received my UOB Platinum Card after 2 wks of application. The Card promoter called me on my mobile on the 27/03 and asked whether I am interested to have 1. 2 days later, the despatch man came and I initials my signature on the application forms. That simple!

I was delighted to get the card mainly bcos some of my friends and colleague did applied but unsuccessful due to unknown reason. This will be my 1st Credit Card and the last 1. I like it very much. Black Background with silver wordings, simply classic display.


I told myself not to be spent-thrift and I shall monitor and restrict myself from "abusing" the card. =)

Happy One Year Anniversary (01/04/2007)

One: being or amounting to a single unit or individual or entire thing, item, or object rather than two or more; a single.

Year: A period of 365 or 366 days, in the Gregorian calendar, divided into 12 calendar months.

Anniversary: the celebration or commemoration of such a date.

Happy One Year Anniversary my deaR! 1st April 2006, the day every moments were diaried. My dear gave mi a surprise, a photo album of our memories for the past 1 year. Fliping thru the album, din know that we had gone that far. She's still the one that I persistently assumed - the one.

The last movie (31/03/2007) that we watched before the year. The Number 23. APRIL 1st
A: 1
P: 16
R: 18
I: 9
L: 12 1st = 1

18-16+9+1+12-1=23!

"The psychological thriller "The Number 23" stars Jim Carrey as a man whose life unravels after he comes into contact with an obscure book titled The Number 23. As he reads the book, he becomes increasingly convinced that it is based on his own life. His obsession with the number 23 starts to consume him, and he begins to realize the book forecasts far graver consequences for his life than he could have ever imagined. "

Amazing? Ha! its jz maths magic. I had used the formula against our date and it took me awhile to formulate the figure.

Perhaps this: 01042006 6X4+1-2=23!

Enuff of the nonsense. This is wat I haf 2 say. Thks dear for everything! Look forwards to the 2nd, 3rd, 4th .... Eternity! Muack!

Gong Xi Fa Cai

My girl is in the East side having Poly Gathering Chalet. Feel lonely n helpless. it's ok, later in the evening its my turn for the Poly Gathering Dinner. Bleah!

Chinese New Year is ard the corner. I hereby wish all the Chinese counterpart a Happy CNY, Gong Xi Fa Cai, Wan Shi Ru Yi. Took 2 days of leave (sucessfully) of working day on Chu 1 n 2. Yeah! For the first time in 3 years I can njoy undisturb holiay! Lala..

Working during CNY

This yr, this is how my work schedule on cny, isn't that great...

Chinese Lunar Year Day 1 (Chu Yi) : Morning Shift
Chinese Lunar Year Day 2 (Chu Er) : Night Shift

Due to my team lacking of Manpower and also insufficient Malay colleague. I might need to work on one of the day. Most likely I will work on Da Nian Chu Yi ba. it's a sad case 2 say. But wat can I do. Protecting life and property is 24/7...

Payrise for Civil Servant

This news was released quite sometime ago. The official rationale for this proposed increase in civil service wages, as stated by Mr. Teo Chee Hean, Minister for Defence and who is in charge of the civil service, is to ensure that the civil service “remain competitive both to recruit and retain” talent within its ranks. The talent to retain is refering ME!

But recently I heard from my supervisor that the actual payrise will be 4% of gross salary. Altot its jz marginal, but like wat ppl say "No fish, prawn also can" . One shouldnt b too greedy, and we shld b grateful that there is no pay cut when the economy is down.

The day that made up of Pizza, Bopian and Rojak...

This blog is dedicated to Ms Shirley, my record breaking gf..(still breaking further). Currently I am now situated over at her residential address using her lappy to blog.

I was forced to blog an entry bcos I haf nt been updating my entry since last yr. As I was rushing for work, I better type it out simple but yet precise.

Dear! by the time u see this msg, I guess I will be walking towards my NPC. Jz wanted 2 tell u that the pizza that ur mum made is just alrite. Dun worry, I will cum ur hse more often den the past and u better slp early 2nite. Promise K?

There she's lying on her bed looking for her clorets sweet. A sweet angel sent from above. Dun feel to bored abt where to go bcos u once told me that no matter where u go, as long as I am by ur side, u will b more den happy. Keep that belief in u k? well, I tink I will stop here.

Last but not least, I wish all reader gd health.