To sum up everything, I'd smoked. Yes, no doubt about it that I failed to keep my promise. All in all, I smoked about 3 sticks in 2 months? I don't know if this is acceptable to anyone but I rather felt pleased that I'd bounced back and did not puff for a week already.
I took my 2b bike practical lesson again on 8th this month. Cummon, I need to wake up from the idea. How can I say I quit smoking when I still puff? Simply bull shitting...Taking 2b lesson is not that I had obtained the licence. Nothing is so real in your hand until it was obtained.
Managed to flip through some of my blog entries in the past and some of the posts were simply childish and nonsensical. People ought to think maturely as they grow older and I should be in that category.
Anyway NS, the 3 months crash test-period is up. The answer is...
Monday, December 13, 2010
Saturday, November 20, 2010
38 days of non Smoking.
It's me posting here again. The feeling of it was very much similar to the time where my ex-gf left me. Then, I started posting my feelings here with the intention of letting her know what my life was.
I am still fine, starting to get over life without you after 2 solid months. I fully understand your situation. As a passerby who appeared after so long, you would not give up what you are enjoying now, youe concrete future awaits you. The risk is too much to bear, the amount of courage to lift is beyond your level of acceptance. It's not wrong in avoiding me but it was cruel. The reality is so cruel. I am simply pathetic here. You must be thinking that I am crazy over you, that was why you ran away. Nope I am not, I am just being an emotional creature who do logical things.
Some people tell me that the validity of crash is 3 months and I am left with a month to prove that point. Yeah, I'm still missing you, although the feelings are somehow faded. We said that our story is to be continued but I can say that it is coming to an end. I knew the outcome because you had stopped contacting me. Sometimes I ponder why I am doing all these for you, what's so attractive about you? Is it worth doing for someone who is not even bothering you? The feeling sucks to the bottom.
38 days without smoke and the days still running, but lately I think I am losing the battle energy against the demon. I remembered that you will quit smoking on next year's valentine day. Make sure you will do as what you promised. I will hang on to that day and tell you 'hey, if I can do it, why can't you? You better stop smoking because it's not good for your health.'
If I can save someone and improve him/her health, you will be the first. It's not easy to give up the habit but I hope that the above sentences will be my inspiration to continue the journey. If I failed, where is your source of support?
Can we talk one day?
Too much things on my mind now, I am signing off now in the early morning of Nov 20th 2010.
I am still fine, starting to get over life without you after 2 solid months. I fully understand your situation. As a passerby who appeared after so long, you would not give up what you are enjoying now, youe concrete future awaits you. The risk is too much to bear, the amount of courage to lift is beyond your level of acceptance. It's not wrong in avoiding me but it was cruel. The reality is so cruel. I am simply pathetic here. You must be thinking that I am crazy over you, that was why you ran away. Nope I am not, I am just being an emotional creature who do logical things.
Some people tell me that the validity of crash is 3 months and I am left with a month to prove that point. Yeah, I'm still missing you, although the feelings are somehow faded. We said that our story is to be continued but I can say that it is coming to an end. I knew the outcome because you had stopped contacting me. Sometimes I ponder why I am doing all these for you, what's so attractive about you? Is it worth doing for someone who is not even bothering you? The feeling sucks to the bottom.
38 days without smoke and the days still running, but lately I think I am losing the battle energy against the demon. I remembered that you will quit smoking on next year's valentine day. Make sure you will do as what you promised. I will hang on to that day and tell you 'hey, if I can do it, why can't you? You better stop smoking because it's not good for your health.'
If I can save someone and improve him/her health, you will be the first. It's not easy to give up the habit but I hope that the above sentences will be my inspiration to continue the journey. If I failed, where is your source of support?
Can we talk one day?
Too much things on my mind now, I am signing off now in the early morning of Nov 20th 2010.
Wednesday, November 03, 2010
My Birthday is Over
What's the point of wishing me when my birthday is over. I don't mean to be harsh on you, I am sorry but I can't lift away the disappointment in you.
Tuesday, November 02, 2010
20 Days of smoking cessation on my 27th Birthday
It's my birthday today. I was wondering if you still remember. As what I expected, you did not plan to ask me out. Probably you were busying with your exams prepartion. I was at home, waiting for even a SMS from you, sending me wishes. You didn't. It was a massive let down and sorry for behaving in such manner because it's my 27th birthday. I feel today is one of the most important moments of the year if I can spend it with you. You didn't fulfill my little wish.
I wonder if time really faded us apart and gradually I feel that you have get yourself over me. If you're happy with your life, continue with it and I will be there for you at the other end.
No herbal tea and duck drumstick for this year's birthday, but still, take care NS....
I wonder if time really faded us apart and gradually I feel that you have get yourself over me. If you're happy with your life, continue with it and I will be there for you at the other end.
No herbal tea and duck drumstick for this year's birthday, but still, take care NS....
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Approaching the 7th day
Many people say God created the world on the 7Th day. I think my mental health will strengthen on the 7Th day as I know the week is coming to an end. I have a lot of side bets with people around me, ranging from an ice-cream, a movie treat to even a $1000 fine (Which I don't think I will declare truthfully if I lose. ;p). The bottom line is not to cheat.
Do I look like a cheater to you? People can always feel my sincerity when I meant business. I publicised this Anti-smoking campaign on my face book to increase my stake. A higher stake which I can't afford to lose. Else the whole world will be laughing on me. I hope this run will continue till my 27Th birthday. I started to feel irritated when my friends and colleagues are smoking around me. It's not the temptation but the smell that irks me.
I'm really appreciated that you contacted me. Yes I do and I'm not asking anything much more from you with even just a response can really make me feel better.
Do I look like a cheater to you? People can always feel my sincerity when I meant business. I publicised this Anti-smoking campaign on my face book to increase my stake. A higher stake which I can't afford to lose. Else the whole world will be laughing on me. I hope this run will continue till my 27Th birthday. I started to feel irritated when my friends and colleagues are smoking around me. It's not the temptation but the smell that irks me.
I'm really appreciated that you contacted me. Yes I do and I'm not asking anything much more from you with even just a response can really make me feel better.
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